Crew's Union

Years ago, some folks from Cedar Lake Yacht Club in Indiana formed a crew's union. They tried to become part of the Teamster's and, indeed, had a deal with Jimmy Hoffa. Hoffa disappeared before this matter was formalized. Several C boat skippers were questioned with respect to that disappearance. 'Me following "work rules" have been leaked to C World in an attempt to revive the effort to establish new working conditions.

  1. Jumping into the water at anytime is strictly prohibited.
  2. When bailing is required, the rule of equal time shall be observed.
  3. In rigging the boat, the equal time rule also applies.
  4. Duh, for carrying the sail bags.
  5. Hiking straps must be soft and well padded.
  6. A crew shall be allowed a five second rest between repeated use of hiking straps.
  7. A crew will fold the full side of the sail, while the skipper will take care of the leach, inverse when rolling sails.
  8. A crew shall not be expected to sail more than three hours in any given day.
  9. The word "please" shall be part of every order given.
  10. Only words of eleven letters or more may be used.
  11. A crew is not responsible for the wind, speedboat chop, etc. and therefore shall not have to listen to comments about such.
  12. A crew shall not be blamed for the placing of the boat by the skipper.
  13. A crew shall not be responsible for any maneuver not instructed before the onset of such maneuver.
  14. A crew shall not be reprimanded for anything because the skipper changes his mind.
  15. A skipper shall exhibit sympathy for any wounds incurred while yachting.
  16. A crew shall only sail in weather that has a wind of 10 MPH, 80', and is clear and sunny.
  17. Refreshments (ambrosia and nectar) shall be provided during the race. Drink-holders a must.
  18. The crew shall be presented with a drink of his/her choice immediately upon disembarking.
  19. All apologies from the rear of the yacht shall be made before docking.
  20. A skipper MUST treat the crew like a sweetheart not like a wife.
  21. A sit-down strike on the part of the crew because of any violations on the part of the skipper should be expected and tolerated graciously.
  22. A crew has the right to determine the number of tacks he/she will perform in a day. It is the skipper's responsibility to use only that many while racing. Any additional tacks shall be performed solely at the discretion of the crew.